CODE: Hulkster

Five days without the internet... I've seen Hell.

It's become apparent to me that I have had a very large lack of coverage of toys I loved when I was younger on here. So I figured it was well past due that I present you with one of the most underlooked toy lines ever...

Before we get too deep into the toys, let me explain the story to those of you who have forgotten or never heard of the sectaurs. Much like eternia, the planet of Symbion was divided into two parts; the good guy part, called the Shining Realm, and the bad guy part, called the Dark Domain. A long time ago when Symbion was a peaceful place it was inhabited by "The Ancients", they came to be very technologically advanced and ended up controlling all aspects of the environment, but, like idiots they mucked up and screwed themselves over. So they sealed up all their important stuff into things called Hyves. This is when the crap hit the fan. The planet became overrun with various groups of weird mutants and monsters. Through the great law of Darwin the strong survived and evolved. These strong beings were: THE SECTAURS!

The Sectuars evolved into two species, the humanoids, as the name suggests, look more human and walk upright and all that good stuff. Then there are the insectoids, insect like beings who can communicate telepathically with humanoids. This isn't even the really weird part yet. A humanoid can form a permanent telepathic bond with an insectoid making them best pals and they don't really need to communicate, cause they know what the other one is thinking.

Over time the humanoids evolved further into good guys and bad guys. The bad guys, as you may have guessed, lived in the Dark Domain, while the good guys lived in the Shining Realm. The leaders of the two groups are ruled by the Empress Devora in the Dark Domain, and King Markor, the Mighty in the Shining Realm. Devora wants to take over the planet and King Markor disappears on a quest to kind the hyve of power to stop her. Much like He-Man the King's son, Dargon knows he must fight for his father and thus... THE BATTLE BEGINS!

Now, the toys were totally the best part of this whole Sectaurs thing. There was a cartoon that was basically an advertisement for the figures, much like He-Man. The cool thing about the toys was that the humanoid would usually come with an insectoid. We all know how much fun giant bugs are to play with. Above you see some of the humanoid figures. These are all bad guys, the sad truth of the sectaurs line is that since most of the figures came with insectoid toys, that the humanoids ended up looking like they weren't fun at all. Now that I look at them by themselves I think they are pretty freaking cool. I mean, they all have antennae, the one dude has a helmet. Look at that guy that looks like a bug, he'd be a bug riding a bug. And if he's fond of volkswagons he could be a bug riding a bug in a bug. That's THREE bugs! And what if he was friends with Bugs Bunny. Madness. Complete, Madness.

The packaging of the toys were pretty cool too. I've always been fond of large window boxes. When I can actually see the toy it helps me decide whether or not it looks cool enough to merit a purchase. Pictures often don't do a toy justice, or they make it look much cooler than it is. I hate buying what I think will be a cool toy and end up with a piece of crap. Nothing makes me angrier! Luckily the insectoids always came in window boxes, so you could see the awesome furry, biting, and vicious creature you were buying. Another plus was the stupid guy that was on it's back.

I just liked this picture cause it showed how they actually put kids playing with the toys on the boxes. If there is anything I miss about old toys is that they actually showed kids playing with the toys. I hate commercials now that just have the toys moving by themselves and doing things they can't actually do. Also, I really miss the stupid faces they would make. Look at that guy. It's like he found a $20 bill underneath the bug, that or he noticed the bug has a giant wang.

No toy line is complete without an obscenely large playset. The sectuars got theirs and it was called "They Hyve". It looks a lot like castle grayskull to me. I was never too big of a fan of playsets. I was much more into vehicles and modeling clay. Nothing beats red modeling clay for instant battle wounds. I'd be like "Oh no, I broke this guys head off" and then I'd figure "Well, I can make it look like there is a giant geyser of blood shooting his head up into the sky with this clay". Sad thing is I actually did this with my Big Boss Man figure. Poor Big Boss Man, he could never get a break.

I have saved the best for last. Here is the best toy made in the entire line. It came with Dargon the hero. The wings on this thing were really cool, in the correct light they looked they were all kinds of different colors and in other light they looked completely clear. Also, it took batteries and the wings were flap quite viciously also there was this black glove on the bottom you put you hand in so it looked like you weren't really holding it. Also there with little things on the bottom to pull to make the thing bite stuff! I loved the sectuars.

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Mike